‘Arry’s Window Bingo

He might not be able to spell, send a text message or work a computer, but one thing Harry Redknapp can certainly do is a transfer deal. With a club in crisis and a transfer window just around the corner, ‘Arry will surely be looking to bring a few new faces to QPR. He could also do with selling a few to make sense of QPR’s bloated squad, which bears all the hallmarks of the silly spending we’ve all done when finding ourselves flushed with cash whilst managing a newly promoted club on Championship Manager.

The rules of “‘Arry’s transfer window bingo” are quite simple: each contributor has to predict six players who will feature in ‘Arry’s January transfer window dealings. All six could be players joining QPR, all six could be leaving QPR or the six could be a mixture of transfers in and out. Who will be the first to shout “Bingo!” in January? Watch this space!

Feel free to comment with your own views or tweet us using #’arry’swindowbingo.

Here are the thoughts of our experts:

—————————————-

Joe W: (MUFC fan, twitter http://twitter.com/JoetheWag)

In – Florent Malouda

Not playing at Chelsea (first team at least!). The offer of first team football until the end of the season without having to move from West London will be too hard to turn down.

In – Joe Cole

Seems an obvious one. Liverpool never really wanted him, very much a London footballer which made his move to Liverpool seem odd. Played under Redknapp before. Won’t have to accept lower wages. DEAD CERT!

In – Asamoah Gyan

A footballing journeyman! Surprising to have never played for a better team given his international pedigree. Left the bright lights of Sunderland for the riches of the Middle East. QPR need a goalscorer despite having a hefty number of them on their books. Gyan will get his cash but will he get his number 3 shirt?

In – Darren Bent

Seems more obvious than the Joe Cole one. They didn’t really see eye-to-eye at Spurs but Redknapp is pragmatic and money talks.

Out – Anton Ferdinand

Despite the links between the Ferdinand and Redknapp dynasties I can see a diplomatic “best for all parties” move. Bizarrely the Terry-Ferdinand saga will be brought up again as he leaves.

Out – Adel Taarabt

‘Arry likes his mavericks (cf Paolo di Canio) but not ones he inherits. Taarabt is not the luxury player designed for a relegation scrap. Redknapp got rid of him at Spurs and will do the same at QPR.

EdwardO:

Out – Adel Taarabt

Some men are born to scrap against Premier League relegation. Men like Neil Redfearn, Kevin Campbell, Stephen Hunt and Gary Caldwell would dive on glass to save their clubs from the drop. Adel Taarabt isn’t one of them. He’s a talented player, but he’s also too much of luxury player for a team in QPR’s position. Without wanting to sound like an American moneyball disciple, with just two goals and three assists last season and two goals and one assist this season, we have seen too little of the talismanic qualities Taarabt displayed in the Championship. If the papers are to be believed, United are sniffing around after him (which makes no sense at all given their embarrassment of riches in the forward positions). I suspect the French league is a more likely destination and ‘Arry will see any move as a good opportunity to make a few bob and rebalance the team.

In – Scott Parker

Redknapp needs a trusted lieutenant, someone to hold the midfield, and Scott Parker fits the bill perfectly. Although he has been missing this season through injury, I suspect he’s too much of an old fashioned English footballer for the visionary AVB. For his part, Parker will probably wonder what the hell AVB is going on about when he tells him that he doesn’t “solidificate” in transition as well as Sandro or Dembele and wonder why he is taking orders from someone who was eating Happy Meals when he was advertising Big Macs. ‘Arry will pull him out of there and make him QPR’s captain.

In – Michael Dawson

This was almost a done deal over the summer. Dawson hasn’t played too much this season and, like Parker, he’s too much of an old fashioned English footballer for AVB. Redknapp’s mentioned to the press that the team needs to tighten up its defence so surely a move for Dawson is on the cards.

In – Tom Huddlestone

Tom Huddlestone completes the trio of Spurs players who will be re-joining Redknapp in January. I’m predicting that ‘Arry might twist a few arms and broker a “buy two, get one free” deal. Both Redknapp and Spurs have previous form on this front. Remember those heady days of the 2005/2006 season when Redknapp, then with Portsmouth, signed Pedro Mendes, Sean Davis and Noe Pamarot from Spurs pretty much simultaneously?

In – Joe Cole

I must confess, I thought Liverpool had done a great bit of business when they signed Joe Cole but unfortunately it hasn’t worked out for either party. Once hailed as the future of English football, Cole has collected a very respectable amount of silverware but has been unlucky with injury. I thought he would fit neatly with Brendan Rodgers’ much trumpeted “philosophy”, but apparently it is Joe Allen, not Cole, who is the Plato to Rodgers’ Socrates. Redknapp will come along and give his former protégé Coley a free role to keep things ticking over in attack.

In – Darren Bent

In – Sandra Redknapp

In – Yakubu

Tough call, this one. QPR need a striker and Darren Bent needs a club that will play him. At the same time, Redknapp and Bent didn’t part on the best of terms at Spurs, with Redknapp famously claiming that his wife, Sandra, would have buried a chance Bent had missed. With Fergie suggesting that he might pull on a jersey himself to shore up United’s creaking defence, the idea of enlisting some of the more senior members of society to bolster Premier League squads seems to be gaining momentum. However, Sandra would surely get found out at this level, and a relegation dogfight is no place for a lady. Redknapp will do what he can to bring his former charge, Yakubu, out of China and to Loftus Road. Yakubu has the kind of fire power that QPR sorely lack, as demonstrated by his 17 goals in 30 games for Blackburn last season.

Gambit: (MUFC fan)

In – Scott Parker

Only on loan, but needs match practice, will die for the cause, and not an AVB type player.

In – Darren Bent

Has goals and will travel, on loan until QPR go down, but may prefer to play with Suarez at Liverpool.

In – Marouane Chamakh

About his standard, might score a couple of headers early on but then back on the bench

In – Danny Simpson

Not wanted in Geordieland, likes a good night out in London, probably up for a scrap

In – Danny Murphy

Brings much needed quality in midfield, likes small West London clubs rather than the big time

In – Michael Dawson

Adds a bit of steel to defence and one of Harrys’ boys

Joe AA: (Everton fan)

In

Darren Bent

Charlie Austin

Michael Dawson

Mario Balotelli (a wild card- harry likes a gamble)

Out

Joey Barton

Djibril Cisse

Dan: (Barnet FC fan)

In – Chris Samba: Need a big fella at the back. Top lad, leader. Hates Russia.

In – Wilson Palacios: Top lad, been through a lot what wiv his brother. Nasty business. Bit of bite in midfield.

In – Gary O’Neil: Honest as the day is long. Model pro. ‘Triffic fella. Had him at Pompey. Grafter. Will have to stay off the golf course for a bit.

In – Charlie Austin: Knows where the goal is. Natural finisher. Will play for England one day. Great story.

In – Kenwyne Jones: Need a big fella up front. Physical presence, bosses ’em about. Him and Zamora up front, that’ll put the fear of god into a few defences

In – Iago Falque: One of my special players (nod nod wink wink). Know his agent well, ‘triffic fella.

Nadim: (Liverpool fan, blog http://diminbeirut.typepad.com, twitter http://twitter.com/DimmyBad)

In – Darren Bent

Not much explanation needed. QPR need goal threat, Bent doesn’t even get on the bench for Villa. Whatever their past, he’s the best Redknapp could get in Jan.

In – Sebastien Coates (loan)

Rumours in Liverpool are that the big Uruguayan is going to be loaned out for some experience. QPR need a strong centre back badly. He’ll be ideal for them; especially as I doubt AVB will let Dawson go

In -Carlo Cudicini

QPR have 4 keepers. It is a well-known fact that Redknapp likes to have at least 8 in his squad and Carlo’s a “triffic” player.

Out – Anton Ferdinand

Crap defender, can see him leaving the R’s to Reading or some other rubbish side.

In – Jordan Ayew

Marseille need cash, and will more likely sell Ayew than Remy. He is young, can play as a striker or on the wings.

In – Nigel Quashie

Because Harry can.

Lee Cooper (Liverpool fan)

Right then,

If Pedro Mendes was still playing, he’d be a dead cert.

But here goes:

In – Darren Bent (loan).  Sandra says that he’s a nice boy.  Paul Lambert doesn’t.  All things point to a January loan.

In – Joe Cole (loan).  Propawh player, as Redknapp would say (incomprehensibly).

In – Michael Dawson (loan).  A decent player inexplicably not getting a game at Spurs and a thick northern centre half, which is just what you need for a relegation battle.  Dawson and Nelson sounds like a firm of structural engineers.  They may form the least nimble pairing in Premier League.  Either may or may not have done a lambing season.

In – Nicolas Anelka (loan).  He has a brother called Claude who was big in the 90s.  Much like Mansun, he’s due a comeback.

In – Tal Ben Haim (Free).  Shaun Derry is crap.  Tal Ben Haim is Jewish.  Them’s my views.

In – Andres D’Alessandro.  Random South American playmaker and arch technician.  His agent may or may not be fond of a brown paper bag coming from the unregulated world of Argentinian football.  Has “previous” with Redknapp at Pompey.

No players will be sold (Redknapp doesn’t have Crouch on the books).  Harry likes a big squad.

Aaron: (Arsenal fan http://twitter.com/obeytheLaw87)

In

Andrei Arshavin

Darren Bent

Wilson Palacios

David Beckham

Michael Dawson

Out

Rob Green

Brendan Lewis: (MUFC fan)

In –  Darren Bent – Despite the infamous miss at White Hart Lane a few years back (“my missus could’ve scored that one”) Flash Arry won’t be able to resist the out of favour Villa striker. This is in spite of the fact that QPR have shedloads of forwards.

In – Frank Lampard Jnr. – According to Rafa, Fat Frank is surplus to requirements at The Bridge. I’m sure his uncle will give him a home a few miles north west. I’m not sure the invite is extended to Christine though.

In – Michael Dawson – no surprises here. This is already a done deal. Dawson was brilliant at Spurs and could add the steel required to sure up the back four at Loftus Road.

In – Matthieu Flamini – Took a massive pay cut to stay with ACM but I reckon this guy is a sucker for the green. Tony Fernandes has lots of it. A perfect match.

Out – Clint Hill – Over the hill.

Out – Djibril Cisse – His marriage has come to and end and I doubt the Frenchman will waste any time in getting acquainted with the singles market in London. Not sure Harry will stand for that so Cisse and his awful dress sense will be packing his bags (Louis Vuitton of course!

Tom: (Liverpool fan, twitter http://twitter.com/tomisred)

IN

Nikola Kalinic – no Harry team is complete without a Croatian. He’d love a bit of Luka or Niko, but he’ll have to settle for a budget version this time. Kalinic failed to impress at Blackburn but is in the goals since his move to the Ukrainian league.

Joe Cole – Young Joe is crying out for good old Uncle Harry to put his arm around him, and good old Uncle Harry would be only too happy to oblige. Pure nostalgia as he still holds a little resentment that young Joe chose Uncle Woy in 2010.

Christopher Katongo – QPR’s African contingent is a little light at the moment. Nothing that Zambian captain Katongo wouldn’t sort out. A quick Google search will reveal his name, and he’d wager that the lure of Loftus Road would be sufficient to tempt him away from Henan Construction FC.

Frank Lampard – Rafa ain’t gonna fancy Fat Frank is he? I know someone who definitely would though. Lampard already confirmed by Benitez to be on his way out in the summer. Why wait until then?

David Suazo – as far as I know a free agent. Harry loves an agent. Especially a free one. Also a Honduran which will add to the multicultural dressing room at Loftus Road. There’s definitely a deal to be done here.

OUT

Adel Taarabt – there’s beef here clearly. This ones definitely maybe. If not now, certainly in the summer. The boy’s not a good trainer.

Al: (MUFC fan, blog http://www.footymatters.com/category/articles/world-leagues/russian-premier-league/, twitter http://twitter.com/alrobjack)

Kevin Phillips – IN

Goals win games; you know and ‘Arry knows it… and KP is the only Englishman to date to win the European Golden Boot. Fact.

Sylvan Ebanks-Blake – IN

Out of contract this summer so could be a cut price deal this Jan. There’s a striker in there, somewhere.

Adel Taarabt – OUT
Seem to remember things weren’t great between the two back in their Spurs days. He’s bound to go to generate $$$ for….

…David Beckham – IN
Top-top  lad, triffic pro, hatful of experience, great at DIY etc etc.

Sylvain Distin – IN
A member of Arry’s FA Cup winning Pompey team of 2008, currently unhappy on the Goodison bench. For old times’ sake.

Raul Rusescu – IN
Currently banging them in for Steaua Bucharest and is fourth top scorer in Europe this season behind Zlatan, Mkhitaryan and some lad called Messi. Stats don’t lie. Do they? Do they?

Shep: (THFC fan, http://twitter.com/irritableshep)

Harder that it initially seems!!

1- Danny Graham (in)

2 – Charlie Austin (in)

3- Armand Traore (out)

4 – Nedum Onuoha (out)

5 – Joe Cole (in, (if only to read Nadim’s outpouring of emotion))

6 – Vegard Forren (in)

And that concludes Shep’s 6 random names off the top of his head

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About thenotsoanonymousfootballfan

Welcome to my blog. I will be using this site as a way of ranting and debating all things MUFC related plus general football stuff, sport, music and daily life in the UK. Highly remunerated individuals in the public eye and positions of power should not expect an easy ride, however this blog is not designed to troll or cyber bully anyone. Anyone who agrees and likes what they read is welcome to comment. Anyone who disagrees and fervently detests what they read is even more welcome to comment so fill your boots…
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8 Responses to ‘Arry’s Window Bingo

  1. Some very strange choices from everyone apart from Edwardo and Joe but that’s just my opinion, I can see Zamora leaving for an odd reason for someone like Barnsley. I they got the Yak and Bent/JerMainMan Defoe in then they’ll stay up but Defoe is on a pwoper triffic run of form at spuds.

  2. Dan says:

    I think Beckham could be one option. QPR reportedly pay astronomical wages to moderate players so the King of Hearts is bound to command a weekly wage of £80’000 a week. Beckham must need the money! Or is it because ‘he just lavs it?’ – If Beckham does return on a donkey wearing a crown, then other than it being distasteful, once he’s actually on the field of play and stopped doing a Princess Di style smile at the public, it will be interesting to see his match fitness in comparison to Giggs and Scholes who have being playing for United ever since Beckham took to hot dogs, ice cream and comfortable seats at US basketball arenas…

  3. Bren says:

    Looks like Joe Cole is off to the Whammers so a few people have missed out there… and somehow Cooper has got Ben Haim right!

  4. Bren says:

    No-one had Kieron Dyer either!

  5. The final list

    QPR

    INS:
    Tal Ben Haim (free), Loic Remy (£8m, Marseille), Yun Suk-Young (undisclosed, Chunnam Dragons), Chris Samba (£12.5m, Anzhi)Jermaine Jenas (undisclosed from Tottenham), Andros Townsend (loan, Tottenham).

    OUTS:
    Michael Harriman (loan, Wycombe), Kieron Dyer (released), Tom Hitchcock (loan, Bristol Rovers), Frankie Sutherland (loan, Portsmouth), Djibril Cisse (loan, Al Gharafa), Rob Hulse (loan, Millwall), Anton Ferdinand (loan, Bursaspor), Jordan Gibbons (loan, Inverness Caledonian Thistle), Alejandro Faurlin (loan, Palermo), DJ Campbell (undisclosed, Blackburn)

    How did we all do?

  6. Bren says:

    I only got one, but no-one got two, so that makes me a winner!

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